For self, or Selfish?

I've been thinking about this doing something completely for yourself lark, and while nothing in particular comes to mind (it was probably getting my paints out, or spending the morning playing the piano) I much prefer doing things with people. That surprises me more than anything. As much as I appreciate and sometimes crave solitude, I really really appreciate my husband and my friends.

I am blessed to have amazing friends who take me as I am, don't mind if I can't eat the food they've prepared because I'm completely shattered and fall asleep on their sofa all evening, to have friends who happily travel a couple of hundred of miles to see us for a weekend, to have friends who would drop what they were doing to help us out when we were struggling and who we would do exactly the same for.

I don't think compromise is a bad word. I was listening to somebody talking the other day about how relationships these days seem a lot of the time to be about competition, about having to prove yourself to the other person; whereas relationships should be complementary, one person balancing with the other. I have no worries about not doing anything completely for myself, because I know that my husband loves me so much that he has let me be a housewife and a mum-to-be which has always been what I wanted, rather than doing a job that I am very competent at but hate. My husband on the other hand is doing what he loves, and has a wife who loves him and supports him in that. A perfect compromise, but we don't see it that way. It's just life, we both give 100% and, funnily enough, get 100% back in return.

It's not what you do, or how long it takes, or who it's for, or whether it's for your self or somebody else, it's about how you do it - it's about your attitude and whether you do things with a grateful heart or with resentment.

I've just looked up and seen a poster I have on the wall which says "love extravagantly" - that's the way to do it. It's far more than just doing your bit: it's doing your bit with everything you've got, whole-heartedly, grateful that you have anything to give in the first place.